it's time to trust the masculine.
i didn't realize that i'm still dealing with many raw emotions from my last "situationship." seriously, most people would just call it a relationship... but because the consent to monogamy was such a trial in that relationship, i choose not to call it that.
when we are recovering from a heartbreak it's easy to shove it away and just be DONE with it. especially if the relationship's end dragged on for so long, or there was so much dragging within it... it's so easy to say, "yeah, okay, i'm really over this," and walk away.
while walking away is okay... sometimes we forget that despite our mental decision to cut ties and leave a connection behind, there are still chords and heartstrings holding on. in some cases, trauma.
maybe we aren't holding on to the person or the relationship. what usually lingers is the trauma. and even when we think we're okay, because we are on the surface, there are many instances that can show us... we aren't actually okay, and that's okay! our bodies, wombs, and hearts all hold memory... not only our minds. so while our mind can easily dispense what doesn't seem important anymore, every other part of us subconsciously remembers. even the subconscious.
it's important not to push the uncomfortable stuff away. when we feel triggered, it's important to take time with ourselves before we react immediately. take TIME to respond. take time. there is nothing wrong with taking space to evaluate how we feel before we continue the conversation or bring up an issue.
i read a newsletter from Kim Anami this morning that mentioned allowing the masculine to "rise to the occasion."
this phrase: RISE TO THE OCCASION. spoke to me so deeply. if we're assuming the masculine will betray and hurt and lie to us... what expectations have we set ourselves up for?
even when we think we're done doing this, sometimes we forget our lessons... and get caught in the cycle of betrayal and loss of trust. sometimes we don't even realize that we aren't trusting anymore as we hold out hope for someone to prove us wrong. perhaps it's not up to anyone to "prove us wrong," but it is always up to us to heal ourselves and resolve that trauma. people are worth trusting. the masculine is worth trusting. if we continue to tell him that he isn't worth trusting, won't he remain in that state? we have to allow him to RISE TO THE OCCASION to be trustworthy, to be genuine, sovereign, reverent, and as divine as we are. because he is, and i'm not sure the masculine understands that he is divine as well.
the feminine has attempted for too long to have too much control. not because she fears not having control. the feminine is more than willing to relinquish control and go with the flow. she just fears the worst: being taken advantage of, being betrayed and deceived and lied to.
she is learning to relax into the masculine. to let him steer a while.
trust that he will take you to the beautiful places you are meant to go. don't make a home out of him. you are your home. but let him in, and don't be afraid to go into him. it's time to bloom with each other. let him take the reigns. he'll steer you back home when it's time. don't be afraid to lean on him. he WANTS to take care of you and provide for you, if you'll let him. you'll be okay, i promise.
the masculine needs healing just like the feminine. and he can't do it alone, nor should he have to. and neither should the feminine. it's time to trust, period. the masculine, the feminine, in others and in ourselves. it's time to be brave and open and honest. it's time to speak up. it's time to share what we feel. it's time to be raw and brave.